We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
