dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
