Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
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