Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Randomize