Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
