Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
