Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Randomize
