***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
