I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
