come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize
