Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I FOUND THE LEGS
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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