I am puke
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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