ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
he told me I talked like a deaf person
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Randomize
