where am i from again
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
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