I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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