The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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