Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize
