He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
