Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Randomize
