tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Randomize
