Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Randomize
