dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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