i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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