3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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