oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Text me some of your sweat
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