HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
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