my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Randomize
