We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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