i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
