So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Randomize
