It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize