i barfeds in our rink
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Randomize
