Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
