she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
