we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize
