so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
