MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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