so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I am mentally ready for anal.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
