there's paper in my vomit.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
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