Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
