No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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