Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
