well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
