I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Randomize