In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
i just google imaged poop.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Randomize
