I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Randomize