Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
