yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
He uses pillows to masturbate.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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