Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
Randomize
