the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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